The Hood Family Blog: The Loss of an Uncle

My uncle Harold, better known as Stinker, passed away early this morning. Honestly, he lived longer than anyone ever thought he would. A few weeks ago we visited him in Kerrville during spring break and I knew his time on this earth was drawing to a close. He was quiet, restless, and not himself. Since that visit, I had not talked to him because he wasn't answering his phone, but was keeping up with his deterioration between my mom's visits and hospice's reports. Yesterday I spoke with the hospice nurse and she informed me that he probably would not make it to the end of the week, which proved to be correct.

Stinker lived in a nursing home in Kerrville for quite a few years and battled an array of medical issues, some of which were due to his exposure to agent orange while serving in Vietnam. He was the black sheep of the family, and proudly wore that title. :) He would refer to me as his protege to anyone he introduced me to. I often wondered if he knew exactly what that word meant . . . LOL. He was a stubborn soul and would butt heads with anyone, including me, who would try to set him straight on things. As a matter of fact, as his medical power of attorney, one day I was called into a meeting with he and the administrators of the nursing home because he had acted inappropriately yelling at some of the employees. We were told that f he did not get himself right, they were going to have to consider moving him to another facility. Luckily he straightened himself out and, while he still didn't like certain individuals there, he learned to share his thoughts with only certain people.

While living at the nursing home, there was one individual who served as a constant in his life, Crystal. She is a med aide and has been there since day one. Stinker became family to her and she treated him as such. She would take him places, feed him, and give him back any grief he dished out to her. She watched after him all these years and while Stinker talked about her all the time, it wasn't until this year that I actually was able to meet her face to face.

Yesterday I reached out to Crystal to chat with her about Stinker since hospice told me he most likely would not make it to the end of the week. My parents are out of town, and I was trying to decide if I should go there and be with him because I didn't want him to be alone as he passed from this earth. He and I have had many conversations regarding his impending death and I knew he had been struggling with what life after death looked like and if he had a place in Heaven. She and I talked for awhile as she was driving home from work. She informed me that she was headed back to the nursing home to stay with him for the night and would call me so I could talk to him. She did just that, and while he could not respond, I did talk to him and she and I shared stories. We laughed A LOT whiles sharing stories of his many antics and she sent me pictures from the different Halloweens where she dressed him up.

Stinker should have been the
one in stripes.

Purple glitter unicorn!

This morning at 2:05am, Crystal called to let me know that Stinker had passed. She called me later this afternoon and, bless her heart, she was struggling. For years, Stinker has been the welcoming committee at the nursing home, greeting every worker and family member who came through the doors. He knew everyone, and everyone knew him. She said it was going to be so weird to walk up and not see him there to greet her.

In many phone conversations, Stinker would tell me that the 'meat wagon' had showed up to take someone else away. He knew the drill, and knew that since he was a veteran, he would leave the facility with the American flag, draped over his body, with the stars at his head and the stripes at his feet. He was very adamant that I receive that flag and keep it. Crystal was kind enough to take and send a picture of Stinker as he departed the facility.

Stinker will be cremated and buried next to his parents in Rolla, Missouri. Per his request, he will have the headstone provided by the government for those who have served in the military. While Stinker would never discuss that time in his life, I know that his time in Vietnam had a lasting effect on who he was. Despite sometimes driving me crazy, I will miss him and our phone conversations.